**This is not a spoiler-free review of this episode. This review is also from a non-reader, and any comments revealing spoilers from the books will be deleted.**
Episode 713: “Hello Goodbye” and Episode 714: “Ye Dinna Get Used To It”
713 – Written by Madeline Brestal & Evan McGahey, Directed by Jan Matthys
714 — Written by Diana Gabaldon, Directed by Jan Matthys
Brianna (Sophie Skelton) was like, “WHAT’S UP Y’ALL!? PLEASE REMEMBER THAT I EXIST.”
Honestly, poor Bri really got the short end of the stick when it came to a story arc in the latter half of this season. I know Roger (Richard Rankin) would rather throw himself off a cliff than let Bri face that ass Rob Cameron (Chris Fulton) alone, but that’s just the predicament Jamie’s daughter finds herself in this time around.
Credit must be given, though, for how well Bri handles herself, given the circumstances. I would’ve lost my damn mind, and she doesn’t even have a cell phone!!
Speaking of — What if they had cell phones? Would AT&T’s long-distance plan cover 200 years?
Now, that’s what I call roaming.
ANYWAY.
At least Bri’s got….running water. IDK.
Also, can the show please stop trying to make Ian (John Bell) and Rachel (Izzy Meikle-Small) the new Jamie (Sam Heughan) and Claire (Caitriona Balfe)?
IT’S NOT FETCH, IT’S NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.
Don’t get me wrong. They ARE cute. But their marital night scene went on WAY too long. I feel like the narrative keeps trying to force me into thinking they are “JAMIE AND CLAIRE, QUAKER EDITION,” but that’s just it.
Quakers are as spicy as a jar of mayonnaise.
The wedding scene WAS funny. I think Sam’s comedic chops are vastly under-appreciated, and I loved seeing him exercise those skills in the past two episodes. Once again, Ian and Rachel’s love is quite sweet, but there’s no more room for growth for them now beyond “HUSBAND!” “WIFE!” “HOW WAS THY DAY?”
Jamie took “An eye for an eye” a bit too literally.
Meanwhile, Roger meets his dad!
I was kind of bored with that storyline (to the point I forgot they met DOUGAL again, for crying out loud), but Roger’s reunion with his long-lost father was downright heartwarming.
Obviously, he can’t TELL his dad, but Richard’s acting in these moments said it all. He longs to explain his identity to his father, tell him he grew up okay, etc.
But he can’t.
No, YOU hang up
I watched these two episodes back-to-back, so forgive me if I intersect the timelines a bit (can you blame me? This is a show about time travel.)
Thankfully, Lord John (David Berry) survived his escape attempt, but unfortunately, his soul died a bit when he had to pretend to be a loyal American named Bertram for another group of Continental soldiers.
Honestly, that should’ve been a dead giveaway right there. What REAL American is naming their kid Bertram?
With apologies to American Bertrams.
Lord John eventually reunites with Claire and Jamie, and even Claire is like, “Bertram? Really?” But eventually, she gets over her name prejudice in order to STICK HER FINGER IN HER (EX?) husband’s eye.
One thing I do like is that they show the actual negative consequences of a character being BRUTALLY punched in the face. Jamie could’ve blinded his British bestie if he had spent less time fake dying and more time doing bicep curls at the Colonial gym.
Anyway.
Claire comes across the Marquis de Lafayette (Charles Crehange) in the market, and America’s French bestie turns out to be a bit clumsy. I love how Claire and the Marquis clicked right away. One thing I think Caitriona doesn’t get enough credit for is her flawless ability to switch in and out of different accents. Her French lilt was quite lovely.
Part of Jamie’s new role as Brigadier General involves hosting dinner parties. I loved the moment Mrs. Figg (Sutara Gayle) called out the rude American soldier for just waltzing into Lord John’s home without so much as a knock.
Is this guy’s name George or something? IDK
I love how Claire keeps meeting famous figures from the Revolutionary War like it’s just another Tuesday. It makes sense, though — after all, they were all just men who had no idea what they were doing.
Speaking of men who have no idea what they’re doing, let’s check on William (Charles Vandervaart)!
Honestly, I’m way more invested in William’s arc with Jane (Silvia Presente) than Ian and Rachel (again, with apologies to Quakers.)
Jane is seeking William’s protection but doesn’t quite explain why. Her little sister, Fanny (Florrie May Wilkinson), is the cutest thing ever, and it’s clear that in another world, they all could’ve been a happy family.
But this is Outlander, where happiness is illegal.
Jane attempts to have some fun with William later, but he rebuffs her, and his reasoning makes sense. He doesn’t want her to feel obligated to sleep with him as a transaction for his protection.
Pissed, Jane threatens to leave camp. William questions why she left the city in the first place.
Please tell me nothing bad happens to her
Turns out there’s been a murder.
The arrogant Captain Harkness BOUGHT a night with Fanny, which is absolutely disgusting and vile and atrocious. Quick on her feet, Jane insisted on accompanying the pair to the bedroom so she could make sure Fanny was okay.
It turns out Big Sis brought a knife to the soiree. Jane doesn’t apologize for murdering Captain Harkness, and now I’m worried about this character I just met.
Seriously, please tell me she escapes, and she and William live happily ever after!!
She’s my favorite new character so far. I don’t mean to hate on Rachel, but I find Jane’s plight far more compelling. The moment when Fanny kissed William’s hand made me want to WEEP.
Also, I found it quite interesting that Brianna came to the conclusion that staying in the present was more dangerous than going back in TIME.
What Cameron and his goons did to her was horrible, but what made it even worse was the cop accusing her of hysterics. It’s been interesting to watch Bri cope on her own, and I love that she went into momma-bear mode, just like Claire. I hope she can reunite with Roger!! Or will she end up going back to Claire and Jamie’s time?
I HAVE NO IDEA.
Nothing makes me feel more patriotic than seeing Jamie in a Colonial officer’s uniform.
Jamie wrestles with commanding a regiment of 300 men. While Claire and Jamie know they’re on the right side of history, there’s no guarantee that his soldiers will make it out alive.
There are so many plot threads going on simultaneously, and I love that. However, I’m also downright curious about how the show aims to connect everything.
I also love that “Ye Dinna Get Used to It” was written by Diana herself! I feel like Outlander is aiming to reunite Roger and Bri with Jamie and Claire, but the logistics of that path have yet to be determined.
Also, WTF.
WILLIAM GOT SET UP??
So it turns out the British soldier who chided William was the same guy who revealed to Claire at Lord John’s dinner party that he was a Colonial spy! He sent poor Will straight into the hands of a few Hessians eager to use Jane’s BF as a punching bag.
Jamie decides to set Lord John free so he can rush off to save “their” son.
Alright, boys. If we win, I’m taking ye all to Disneyland, like they say after the Super Bowl.
I really don’t want anyone to die by the end of the season, but many of our favorites are on a dangerous path.
But I have a feeling old George W. and the Marquis will be okay. I’d bet my left leg on it.
Until next time, Outlander fans!
THIS WEEK, FRIDAY, JANUARY 3RD, AT 8 PM ET: EPISODE 715: “WRITTEN IN MY OWN HEART’S BLOOD”
Synopsis: “Claire is in danger as the American Revolution reaches the pivotal Battle of Monmouth. Lord John Grey and Ian race to save William. Brianna makes an important decision.”
